Uh... Was that sunrise, or sunset?

That was the official question of the day... So, I just finished working my last night shift for at least the next two weeks... Wow, working nights is just so wierd, I don't know how people make a career out of it. I guess the bright side of it all is that I have seen some beautiful sunrises and sunsets in the past three weeks...

Last night was the first time in about six months that I have actually felt like a bonafide RN, not just some nursing student pretending to be an RN (as I have felt for the past three weeks)... I guess it also helps that my preceptor isn't hovering over me all of the time and lets me plan my shift as I see fit (as long as everything gets done). I am also quite proficient with the computer charting now, so that always makes me feel as if I am actually "getting it."

For the last two nights I have had the pleasure of caring for one of the cutest 4-month-olds I have ever encountered. Just the sweetest little thing, so smiley and friendly, despite the fact that she is as sick as a dog. When I went in to take her vital signs at 4 am today, she grabbed my finger and pulled my hand toward her chest while I was trying to put the pulse oximeter on her thumb. She was just so content to have something to hold on to, I had a hard time leaving the room. That absolutely made my day after a long 12-hour shift.

Wow, I just got off work, and I am still talking about work... On to something else.

Jim and I ate at this awesome restaurant by our apartment complex last week. I had the second-most tender filet (nothing surpasses Tarpy's, of course), the second-best mashed potatoes (Tarpy's again), and the second-tastiest green beans I have ever eaten (fooled you! This time it's Buca). I even had enough left over (yep, there was enough for me to have left-overs. Shocking, I know) to take to work the next night. All of the nurses on the unit were jealous that I had such a nice dinner in my tummy, and they only had Lean Cuisine...

It also rained cats-and-dogs the night before last, so there were some awesome puddles to drive through in the apartment complex yesterday morning. It reminded me of driving through puddles a long time ago, with a boy, in a Jeep, laughing and/or screaming the entire time. Always fun, it definitely put a smile on my face after a long, disorganized, and generally crappy night.

Other than that, not much is going on. Peter and I are trying to make some plans to get together this week, since he has spent the past two weeks in the field, so we'll see how that works out. Hopefully I can see Marty at some point as well. They definitely had some interesting experiences with weapons during the past two weeks, judging from Marty's play-by-play e-mail commentary...

Well, it is now 9 am and I need to head back to the apartment and pass out...

66H out...

Jinx is truly a nocturnal little creature...

So I woke up in the middle of the night to a loud, ongoing ruckus in the bathroom... I got up to see what little princess was destroying, and found her in the bathtub with one of her toys. She has resurrected the San Jose past-time of "chase her toys in the bathtub." She looked at me for a brief second when I turned the light on, then continued her mad chase around the tub. I couldn't help but laugh, then I decided I needed to get a picture of her in action. The result...

In other news, I am now done with Department of Nursing orientation. (12 more continuing education units under my belt; Thank you Alabama Department of Nursing Licensure!) Only three more night shifts to go this week, then on to days. I am also quite excited because I will be taking my Advanced Cardiac Life Support (ACLS for those that are in the biz...) at the beginning of February, so that will be cool. After I take ACLS, I will be eligible to take Pediatric Advanced Life Support (PALS), and the Neonatal Resuscitation Program (NRP). Those of you that know me know how much I love my education...

Well, not too much else is going on in this neck of the woods. Well, that is not altogether true... While I was talking to Danielle today I decided that I want to paint the window walls in my room and the living room orange to match the decor and give my apartment more life... So it is off to the Home Depot tomorrow to look at paint chips. I think it will look awesome, I can't wait... I'll keep you posted on the paint decisions, since I know y'all will be on the edge of your seats waiting for the results...

Oh, I think Jim's girlfriend is calling, so I am Audi 5000...

66H out...

Oxygen is definitely the spot NOT to meet an officer...

So, I guess this could easily be an addendum to my last blog... Remember when I told you about the guy that told Jim I was gorgeous the other night? Well, the next night, at the same club, while I walked to the bar to get a drink, some random guy told Jim that he "need[ed] to chase that (profane word that begins with 's'), because she is hot!" Wow, I guess it was just my weekend...

Speaking of, Jim and I also played a fun game while we were there... Guess your rank. For every guy with a "high and tight" that talked to me, Jim and I would guess his rank as he walked over, then I would ask what rank he was to see if we were right. Great fun... If I remember correctly, we were about three for five... Maybe I can use it as a segment in my blog when Jinx isn't busy destroying things...

On Saturday night, Jim and I played poker with four of his buddies... I didn't win the pot, but I kicked five guys' butts (including Jim's) before I lost with a full-house (pocket Queens over 7's), to a full-house (pocket Kings over 7's)... I know that you are thinking I was pissed, but I have never made it to the top two before, so I was quite satisfied with the end result (even if I did lose my ten dollars). In retrospect, I really wish I had my camera to take a picture of my chip stack... It was quite impressive. Steve, you would have been so proud of your little poker prodigy!

In other news, I will be participating in the flag retreat ceremony for the Army Nurse Corps Birthday celebration on Wednesday afternoon, so that should be cool. I just hope I remember to order arms and center face at the correct time, or I will look like a silly doof in front of roughly one hundred people...

Well, more Department of Nursing Orientation tomorrow morning, so I gotta run and make my lunch, polish my boots, and get the coffee ready to brew in the morning...

66H out...

Audrey partied too hard last night...

To begin, I just want everyone to know that I did not drive last night and that I woke up in my own apartment this afternoon... But I had so much to drink that I did not feel human until about 6 pm this evening. The best part about it is that Jim and I are going out again tonight... However, we do need to get shirts made that say "Not my boyfriend" and "Not my girlfriend," so that when we go out, we don't ruin each other's game... I am delighted to report that the highlight of the evening was some random dude that came over to Jim and said, "Is that your girlfriend? If she is, you scored, because she is absolutely gorgeous!" Wow, I thought I looked cute last night, but I guess the cardigan-sweater-librarian-look was really working for me last night.

Okay, so Jim is such a punk because I just found out that he stole one of my metal puzzle games from apartment!! Good thing I know where he lives... I guess I'll let it slide since he has been so nice about letting me use his computer. Jim you're the best neighbor ever...

Anyhow, back to the blog at hand... I worked my first full week of nights this week, and the two 12's sucked because the census was so low that there wasn't much to do. The 8 that I worked on Wednesday was cool because we had a pediatric admission, so we had quite a bit to do right at the end of our shift that made the time fly. I have Department of Nursing orientation Monday and Tuesday, finish out the week on nights, then it is back to days the week after next. I am excited because almost all of the major nursing care is done on day shift, so I will start doing a lot more than just learning how to chart on the computer.

Okay, so it is time for everyone's favorite part of my blog -- the reason you all keep tuning in... Fun with fortune cookies!

1. Your ambition keeps you ahead of others...
2. Without knowing the force of words, it is impossible to know man...
3. The only way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost...
4. You have a great deal of energy and self-reliance...

I mentioned in my last entry that I needed to come up with a new segment on my blog to keep your attention when I run out of fortunes. Well, I didn't have to think too hard because Jinx inspired the newest segment of my blog... What Jinx destroyed today.

So I woke up Monday morning to a crash in the living room... When I went out to inspect the damage, I found my five-arm floor lamp destroyed (pictured at right). She must have tried to jump on it, or climb on it, but whatever she tried to do, she broke all five arms off. Well, the electrical wiring was still intact, but the damage was irreparable. I have since purchased a replacement, but I placed it further away from the entertainment center to avoid a repeat appearance of the floor lamp in What Jinx destroyed today. Jinx is currently working on destroying the mini-blinds in my room, so its picture will soon be appearing as well...

In other news, I hate sheet rock screws... I hung curtains in my room and in the living room on Monday, and I had a massive run-in with the sheet rock screws included in the curtain rod kits... It might not have been so traumatic had the manufacturer included the correct size sheet rock screws, but now I will have to get some compound and the correct color of paint to fill the massive holes above the window in my room. The living room set was not so bad, because I got better sheet rock screws... Dad, you would have been horrified watching me try to hang the first set of curtains... It wasn't pretty.

Well, I have provided you with a comprehensive update of the week, and now I must go get ready to hit downtown Columbus again tonight... Not so much to drink tonight though, I really don't want to spent the rest of the day recovering tomorrow... Again!

She's crafty...

Well, I am quite pleased with how productive and handy I was this weekend... I hung bamboo shades and put up lights out on the patio (pictured at left), I fixed one of the sliding metal doors in my kitchen and I am now an expert at square-inch utilization... Since I don't have a dresser yet, and I wanted to get all of my clothes out of boxes and suitcases, I had to fit all of my clothing into one closet for the time being. That's right folks, Audrey had to get all of her clothes into one closet... How did she accomplish such a feat you ask? Well, I made use of just about every square-inch of it... literally. I may have to post pictures, because I know there are some naysayers out there that don't believe me (the same ones that can't believe that I actually cook meals now).

Speaking of cooking, I cooked with my crock pot again tonight. I felt confident enough to invite Jim over to try my culinary handiwork, and he liked it! He felt that the vegetables were still a bit too crunchy, but I myself prefer them that way. I detest mushy vegetables, they make me want to huck... After I finish up the stew, I am planning on making a cheddar soup. The receipe sounded great, so I am going to go for it. I will keep y'all posted on how it turns out...

In other news, I am happy to report that the Thule locks/keys saga is finally over... I wised up and became smarter than the locks... While I was getting deisel on Friday, I thought to myself, "If I were my locks, and I wanted to make sure that I got to Georgia with Audrey, what part of the car would I have hitched a ride in?" At that moment, the light bulb came on... I opened the trunk and opened up my Rubbermaid container of car neccessities, and there they were!! I did a little dance and a cheer, but not too much, I was in my BDUs at the gas station on post...

And now on to the part of my blog that everyone looks forward to... The quote of the day: MXC (a Japanese game show that Spike TV comically dubs into English) - "You know you've had a good meal when you get the meat-sweats..." And last, but not least... Fun with fortune cookies!

1. Your strength will grow stronger by being tried...
2. Your artistic talents win the approval and applause of others...
3. Life has no other desire but to fulfill itself...
4. A former lover comes back into your life... (I swear, I didn't make that one up!)

Wow, those were good ones today!! I had fun, and I hope you did too! Sadly, only have enough fortune cookis left for three more installments of Fun with fortune cookies, so I will have to start thinking of another segment for my blog; However, I am getting quite fond of the WTF moment of the day...

Well, I start on nights tomorrow, so I am off to keep myself awake until about 3 or 4 am... Oooh, maybe I'll go to Wal-Mart, that's always a good time. Aye! Time for Grey's Anatomy, can't miss Dr. McDreamy...

66H out...

Getting my fix...

So I am at Kinko's paying out the nose to post some pictures that belong to a previous post... If you want to see how my apartment is coming along scroll down a few posts and check it out! (The Fortune Teller Miracle Fish is posted just for you Geoff! Congratulations again on the new Subee!)

Well, today was another excellent day for improving/learning new skills at Martin Army... I was three for three with IV's this morning in pre-op (all of my patients were extremely pleased), I did six ECG's by lunch, and gave three immunizations in the Pediatric Clinic this afternoon. Overall, I chalked it up as a successful day...

After I left the hospital, I had a fairly funny WTF moment of the day... I was at the PX getting diesel before heading home, and the fuel nozzle kept shutting off while I tried to pump. I went into the PX to tell the attendant the pump was not working and she suggested moving it around to see if it was a positioning issue, so I went back out and tried again, but to no avail. I pulled up to the next pump, began fueling my car and went back into the PX to tell her that the pump was truly broken. She proceeded to ask me, in front of several senior Special Forces NCOs, "Are you sure that your car takes diesel?" as if I didn't know what type of fuel my own car takes. All of the NCO's in line started to laugh as I told her, "Yes, my Turbo Diesel Volkswagen has taken diesel ever since it rolled out of the factory in Germany..." I guess it just wouldn't cross my mind to ask someone a question like that if they came back twice to tell me a pump was broken... Nonetheless, it was a pretty amusing end to the day.

Well kids, it is a Friday night and I am not about to burn any more of it by blogging. My friend Tas just called, so I may have to go cirrhose a few liver cells... Hey, I just made up the verb form of the noun cirrhosis! And the gas station attendant has the nerve to ask me if I am sure that my car takes diesel... Obviously I am much smarter than that!

66H out...

P.S. I also posted the picture of me cooking. For those that need to see it to believe it, go back to the January 2nd post... It is there in full color for you to marvel at!

Final score...

And now for the moment you have all been waiting for... My final score in the lab this morning was...

-15 successful draws
-3 missed draws (after three sticks each, then I got a lab tech)
-2 blown veins
-1 scaredy-cat Ranger... He was fun.

I spent the afternoon in the Pediatric Clinic doing assessments and giving shots. The little ones like you so much until the treatments, then they want nothing to do with you... Makes me think that I don't ever want to do Pediatric nursing. I love little ones too much for any of them to be scared of me... It would break my heart.

Tomorrow morning I am starting IV's for all pre-surgical patients, and tomorrow afternoon I will be doing ECG's and other cardiac monitoring procedures in the Cardiac Lab. I can't tell you how exhausting learning and executing new skills are. It seems as if my endorphins were in overdrive all day while I was doing procedures and by the end of the day I was totally wiped-out.

Okay, enough of the nursing junk! Let's get to the fun... Fun with fortune cookies!

1. You are a dreamer, and your thinking is inspirational...
2. You will be involved in many gatherings and parties...
3. A cheerful letter or message is on its way to you...
4. It is nice to be important, but more important to be nice...

Not too bad today... A couple of good ones to kick around.

Well, I didn't quite get all of my laundry done last night and I am -1 brown t-shirt, so I absolutely need to quit slacking, suck it up and do the last load tonight...

"In cadence..."

66H out...

My name is Sally O'Mally... and I'm 50!

To commemorate the fiftieth post on my blog, I pulled some inspiration from SNL's "The Best of Molly Shannon" for the title of today's post...

First of all, Geoff, you are such a good sport for commenting on my last four blogs... Who knew coersion would work so well? I just figured I would give you something to do in your downtime at work a few nights ago...

So I drew blood in the lab for three hours this morning... One soldier commented on how good I was at drawing blood, so I didn't tell him that he was my first stick in over a year. I just said, "Well, you are dealing with a professional..." I tried to keep my voice and hands from shaking as I said it. However, I don't think the general that I stuck thought I was so good... That was fun. Not the first vein I've blown, and I'm certain it won't be the last. Oh well, you don't always get it on the first stick... I am back in the lab again tomorrow and I will do all of the blood draws that come through my station, so by tomorrow afternoon I should be a pro...

I am also an official hospital employee now... Since we finished Hospital Orientation yesterday, I was allowed to get my picture ID badge today. With the temporary badge I felt like I was in nursing school clinicals again... People giving you the eye like you don't belong, or people asking the perennial question, "What do you do here again?" My picture turned out super-cute too, which is nice, since we must always have our badge on our collar with the picture facing out. I know it sounds silly, but people that know me well understand how picture-phobic I can be...

Wow, I am so glad that I saved my post as a draft earlier, or I would have missed out on posting the next item... The WTF (what the f**k) moment of the day: This is how a piece of mail was addressed to me today... LT and Mrs Adrey Richert. Uhhh, okay...

And now, for the second-fastest growing quiz sensation... Fun with fortune cookies:

1. You are sympathetic to the problems of others...
2. Acceptance is the key to peace of mind...
3. What the mind can concieve and believe it can achieve...
4. You are cheerful and well-liked... (How did they know?!)

Mixed bag today; Two good, two mediocre... For those of you just joining Fun with fortune cookies, the rules are outlined in both my December 22nd and 24th posts, so check 'em out and play along!!

Well, ladies and gentleman, boys and girls, it is off to do some laundry...

66H out...

Computer misery...

So the computer problems continue... I failed to pack my system disks and my camera installation software, so I am forced to use various other computers, depending on what time of the day it is and if Jim is home... So frustrating. Now I can't blog whenever I feel like it and I can't post pictures right now unless I go to Kinko's and pay an arm and a leg to use the internet... (Which is what I am doing right now because I am becoming a blogging, picture-posting addict.)

In other, more exciting news... Well, news anyways... My household goods arrived on the 5th and I spent three long days unpacking all of the boxes. My, my, I found some interesting things while I was unpacking: A box of all of the letters I received while I was in France, a box of old high school stuff, my "Sean" box, my "Geoff" box, and just random "Why did I keep that?" stuff. Quite the trip down memory lane to say the least... But the flip-side of my hard work is that the apartment is looking awesome now that I have all of the boxes and trash bags out of the way. Final score: 39 Boxes, 14 bags of trash, and two trips to the trash compactor... Thanks for your help Jim.

One thing that I realized from unpacking is that the Thule locks/keys saga continues!! After not being able to find the set of keys that unlocks the locks to my car rack (I literally turned my room in San Jose upside down to find them), I called Thule to order a new set... After unpacking all of the boxes, now I can't find the locks... Oh, but it gets better - While unpacking one of the boxes, I found the original set of keys that came with the locks. The drama surrounding the whole saga has been so ridiculous that I laughed after voicing a long string of explitives last night. I feel my blood pressure going up just thinking about it...

I also found three old fortunes and my Fortune Teller Miracle Fish (a fish that tells your fortune by what it does when you place it in the palm of your hand), so I have been inspired to create a one-time addendum to the Fun with fortune cookies segment of my blog... And now, Vintage fun with fortune cookies!

1. You are going to have a new love affair...(found in my old diary)
2. The luck that is ordained for you will be coveted by others... (found at the bottom of a box)
3. Fame and fortune is coming your way... (also found at the bottom of a box)
4. Miracle Fish: I am passionate... (due to the fact that it curled up entirely)

And now for current Fun with fortune cookies!

1. You will be rewarded for your efforts...
2. You are active, full of ideas, and have a generous nature...
3. Someone you recently met will play an important role in your life... (Hmmm, interesting...)
4. The key to happiness is having dreams...

Jinx is adjusting nicely to her new home; She loves the screened-in porch and continues to snooze on the shelf above the fridge. Now, she is even coming out to greet people when I have company.

As I was chilling out in my "new and improved" living room, I casually glanced down at the books I arranged under the glass top of my coffee table and took note of what an odd collection of books I put out, enough so to write them down and post them on my blog... Enjoy!

"The Art of War"
"Books of the Century"
"So Now You Know... A Compendium of Completely Useless Information"
"The Most Evil Women in History"
"The Darwin Awards"
"The IG Nobel Prizes"
"The Experts' Guide to 100 Things Everyone Should Know How to Do"
"Paris - Then and Now"
"Audrey [Hepburn] - A Life in Pictures"

Lastly, I attended a Newcomers' Orientation tour on Friday. It was a great tour of the post and of downtown Columbus. We even got some free food and a roast chicken lunch when we toured the Commissary! At the end of the tour, the tour guide raffled off some prizes and I won a pair of tickets to the symphony!! I am excited, I haven't gotten dressed to the nines in a while. Hopefully it will be a good time...

Well, that is about it for now... Hospital Orientation tomorrow and Tuesday, then it is on to 12-hour nights starting Wednesday... I'll be thinking of you while you are working nights too Geoff.

66H out...

What does a girl have to do?!

I don't know why all of the computers in the business center suck so badly... I haven't been able to post pictures on my blog from a CD here for some gay reason or another, not to mention that my computer is jacked up right now and I have to purge and reformat the hard drive... Almost enough to piss me off.

Wow, okay, I think I am alright now... So I had my first day of work yesterday and it was the most uneventful day ever. The census is still really low, and we had more nurses than patients on the floor. However, all of that will change now that Basic Training, Airborne and Ranger School is back in session... Bring on the orthopedic and pneumonia patients!!

I am happy to report that my first stew turned out awesome!! Thank you crock-pot, you're the best! I was inspired to try another recipe, so I will keep y'all informed about my new cooking adventures... Oooh, maybe I will make that a new segment on my blog...

Well, I am off to get my hair cut, do laundry, and I might actually work out for the first time in a month... Well, that is not all together true, I tried to swim today, but the pools aren't heated ever, so I am really glad that my Mom sent my wetsuit with my household goods...

66H out...

If a tree falls in the woods...

So you might be wondering what the title of my blog is all about today... Well ladies and gentlemen, Audrey purchased a crock pot today (thank you Santa Mommy), and she actually cooked with it!! Shocking I know, I hope y'all were sitting down for that one... I made Jim take a picture of me cooking, because I knew there would be some skeptics out there. Like I said, "If a tree falls in the woods, and no one is there to hear it, does it really make a sound?"

We had the craziest storm last night - complete with thunder, lightening and rain... At about 3:30 am, there was a crash of thunder that was so loud, it set off car alarms in the parking lot. I truly thought that Ft. Benning was being bombed, it was nuts... Needless to say, I had a hard time sleeping and called Geoff at 4:30 am (1:30 am Cali time). Apparently, people were doing some crazy corporate flying last night so he couldn't talk long, but it still made me feel better to hear a familiar voice. Thanks Geoff! :)

In other news, I have my first shift at the hospital tomorrow. I am somewhat nervous even though I am just orienting to the floor, but I also have meetings with the Chief Nurse and the Hospital Commander as well (good thing I picked up my clean, starched uniforms yesterday).

Okay, now on to the always amusing portion of Audrey's blog... Fun with fortune cookies!

1. Faith is the answer to success...
2. Do not avoid what you know to be right...
3. Your whole family is well...
4. If you focus on a certain path, you may miss the detours you were meant to take... (written by an out-of-work Hallmark greeting card writer perhaps?)

I will leave you with that thought while I go stir the stew...

66H out...

Happy New Year!

So it is the first day of 2006...

I didn't do too much for New Year's Eve, but that is okay, at least this is the first time in about 8 years that I didn't sell people food... In my opinion, doing nothing, rather than begging people for tips is a huge step up... And because I got my cable hooked up yesterday, I ended up watching all of the "I Love the 80's" on VH1. I know, I know... I can't help it. I guess it isn't such a shock for those that know me fairly well...

Jim and his brother went to Atlanta for New Year's Eve; They invited me, but I was like "Right, you guys are going looking for girls, and having a girl with you is the kiss of death..." So, I respectfully declined the invite and drank a good bottle of wine to go with the VH1...

I am happy to report that Jinx did very well on the plane ride home... She is slowly adjusting to the apartment and spent most of the day out from under the covers on my bed, unlike the first day she was here... She has also found a spot above the fridge that she likes, so I don't fight it.

Later today, I am picking my friend Peter up from the airport. I am excited that both Peter and Marty will be back in Columbus, so I can hang out with them. However, I am not sure how excited they are to be back at OBC...

To round things out today, I have two Quotes of the day: I remembered the quote that I forgot due to alcohol-related imparement several blogs ago. Jim - "Oh yeah, that was a picture from junior year of high school, when I had a perm..." But wait, here's more wisdom from Jim's mouth... "When I walk up to a girl and she's not feeling it, I didn't wear the right shirt that night, because I can't think of what else it could be..."

Anyhow, I am off to the Wal-Mart...

Happy New Year everyone... Don't make any resolutions that I wouldn't make...

66H out...